Baseball Playoffs Draw Nigh - Time to Bring the Hate!
By Oaktown Girl
Well folks, the MLB regular season ends on Sunday, and the postseason begins** on Wednesday. If you’re like me and your team’s not going to be in the playoff mix, that means only one thing: hardcore cheering against the team you hate the most, and for the team you hate the least.
Properly Bringing the Hate against a sports team is a skilled art, best not left to amateurs. It takes guile, cunning, and an unshakable belief that Bringing the Hate in a sports fan setting is a karma-free activity. (Amateurs can, however, safely participate by seeking the expertise, council, and protection of an experienced trained professional like myself).
Everything must be in place: good luck (or bad luck) charms at the ready and in their proper location and position; knowledge of which teams are playing and when so bad vibes can be sent at the exact time; non-sports fans/ambivalent friends must be given their marching orders about who they’re cheering for/against in order to help spread the love; and your rap regarding your position must be well-prepared and watertight in the event you need to put the smackdown on some fool who dares question you.
A good, sturdy pair of boots is advisable - you can bet your bottom dollar that at some point you’ll be plagued by some ignorant bandwagon twit who was not born and raised in New York or New Jersey cheering for the Stankees. That’s an ass just begging to be kicked, and you should most certainly oblige. Boots provide both the toe protection and ankle support to get the job done right.
Yes, the WAAGNFNP will do everything possible to try to have at least one live blogging event for the playoffs. Stay tuned, and tell your friends.
And now for your enjoyment, this Simpsons video is hysterical - you’ll want to watch the the whole thing, sports fan or not:
**The information on these links will change over time, of course. So for the historical record, as of this writing if The Season ended today, the playoffs would look like this:
In the AL: NY at Cleveland, and LA at Boston. In the NL: Chicago at Arizona, and San Diego at NY or Philly.
Responses to “Open Thread (#18)”